So I've been on a semi-hiatus these past days. I haven't posted anything on my blog for about a month (woah!) and I haven't tweeted anything for almost 5 days.
I've just been on a vacation from a faraway island for 4 days, that's why. And all those days, I have no internet access at all. Even my phone's got no signal. So it seemed like a torture for me, especially since I am an international fangirl who relies largely on the internet for updates 'bout my KPop biases.
But surprisingly, it didn't bother me at all. Maybe it's the place. Because it was a really majestic island to stay at. And I've been longing to go to the beach for like forever.
And so when I came back, I felt so disconnected with my fangirl life. I really felt like I've missed a lot and it's getting hard to catch up because as scary as it sounds, I'm lacking interest. For some UNKNOWN reason, I am starting to become less interested with fangirl-ing.
So I think it's like this: I am going thru a PHASE. I don't know what it is or if every single fangirl goes thru it as well. I don't know when or how it started and when it'll end. All I know is right now, I am a little bit disconnected.
But, I am still looking forward to attending CNBLUE's Blue Moon in Manila and I am still getting a VIP seat.
But for now, I will try and sort out my mind and get a hold of my thoughts which were actually all over the place ever since I came back from that vacation.
It's like I've gone soul-searching and right now, I am torn between living a real adult lady's life or a noona fangirl's one.
Fangirl-ing has been a huge part of my life now. I've loved CNBLUE more than I have loved any other guy in my life (Yeah. I sound miserable~) And so being in this confused state of mind right now is scary for me. I don't want to let go of everything. I can't let go of my fangirl life just like that.
I hope I get thru with this phase as soon as possible.